Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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