so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?