Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
