we're blogging at a bar
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
