I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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