I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
