so explain again why im purple
no
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
