Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
