Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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