Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
