i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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