i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Randomize
