Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Randomize
