oh god the rape fog is back!
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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