I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
