Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Randomize