her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
