im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
