omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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