Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
