The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
