VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
