honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
