The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
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