Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
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