I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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