hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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