one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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