Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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