The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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