i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize