things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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