You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
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your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
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Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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