Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
