Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He has the fingertips of a God
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