is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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