weddingsv make me drug and hornr
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize