that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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