But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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