Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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