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She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
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