kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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