Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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