but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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