I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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