We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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