Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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