so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize