I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
me + whiskey = a bad person
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
