I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Randomize
