i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
