garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
